April 1st, 2013

So people, how's the weather?

This week has just been a whole bunch of Russia being indecisive about warming up. Lot's of melting and freezing. Spring is on it's way though. I'm pretty much ready for it. Puddles = Satan when your shoes are already filled with almost two years of hard work... and big holes... So Elder Michaelis just showed me a picture of his neices and nephew and said "These guys totally beat your neices and nephews" and I have to admit, the picture was way adorable... but then I threw back all the stories that Rachel has told me about Maddie and Boston... and he knew he was defeated. I'm serious, you should have seen the look on his face when he realized that my neices and nephews were better. haha! He didn't admit it out loud though.

So also, we now have permission to email friends because of a first presidency decision... I may not be super good at rezponding depending on how often I get emails, but I thought I'd throw that out there. 

It was easter on sunday...? Huh... weird. Here in Russia, Easter isn't until May 5th... happy easter I guess though!

Mother, I was thinking the other day and I was reminded of a recipe that would be very good. You know that one baked chicken and rice stuff with the cream of chicken and bacon/ham sauce? yeah, thad be kool if you tossed that my way. We've been having cook offs with members, competing who can make the best meals as of late... it's been really fun, and filled with more dinner appointments I've ever had. Sometimes I win, sometimes they win, but it's all just delicious food in the end... haha! I'm ashamed to say that I have gained I think five pounds of the unfortunate kind of weight. haha!

So this week, I yelled at my companion... yeah. It wasn't his fault. I had just gottten chewed out by people on the phone and other circumstances stacked up and I was doing a good job at keeping my cool and being patient and then he did something really small that he was just joking about and I meant to "play" frustrated, but a bit of realy frustration spilled out and I raised my voice a bit. only for one word and I bit my tongue and felt really bad and went red in the face... he is SOOO great though because he immediately shrugged it off and we were friends again in three seconds. Man, that's the second time I've let my emotions out of hand, the first time was my first cycle in an understandable situation, this one I felt waayy bad for though... But I learned a lot about myself though!

So to be honest, I'm... how do I put this. I'm not an "Always" missionary. At least, not the kind of Always missionary that I wanted and expected to be. I don't "Always" put in 100% like I wish I would and there are SOOO many times where I KNOW I should do something and I KNOW it's a prompting from the spirit... and I DONT DO IT!!! So there's that... and yes. It bothers me. BUT! I've become an a different kind of Always missionary in the fact that I understand that I can ALWAYS change. I can ALWAYS come back to Christ, because he is ALWAYS waiting with open arms. And I've been prepared to be an ALWAYS person. As a normal person, I'm not always going to be perfect. That's not the game though. It's about ALWAYS coming back. always trying again. Always doing a bit better. So, yeah, I haven't become the perfect, "Always" missionary that I expected, but I've become something that I didn't expect. I still have time though, and I can do a lot better before the end of my mission! I'm going to finish off with no regrets! Thanks for your constant support and encouragement! Love you all!

K bye.

Elder Swartz!